Sweet'N Low Butterscotch Vodka

Every once in a while people ask me if my drinks are too sugary. I reply to them, "If you're concerned about the sugar content, you're not drunk enough." A few times after that, they wanted to know if there is a diabetic candy booze that they can enjoy. Maybe. Perhaps. Yeast and sugar and all that. In any event, I found a sugar free candy to play with.
See? Sugar free. The package even says so.
This package contained exactly 10 pieces of candy, which means I'm going to use them all.

Werther's Original Vodka

Do you remember when you would go to you're Grandma's house as a child, and she'd be there to greet you with Werther's? Then when you got older, she'd greet you with drinks? No? Maybe I just come from a weird family then. Anyways I wanted to mix the two worlds together.

Step one, collect all the Werther's... Even if you must steal them from Grandma's house.

Butterscotch Vodka

From my years on television as a Anchorman, you learn a thing or two. One - Always smoke a cigar over cigarettes. Two - You can make up most forign minister's names, and no one will know. Three - Always drink scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch. Unfortunately we are out of our own, so we get to make some.

Here's the subject of our interview. About 7" tall, 200g, and probably the Kingpin of crime.